So my mom called her back to the table. She said to her, I am not sure how well you were trained as a waitress or where you were trained, but when you wait on a table, you should greet EVERYONE and ask EVERYONE if they would like a drink or food. Not only did you not acknowledge my son was at the table when you brought two waters instead of three, you never even asked or waited to see if he wanted anything to eat. She proceeded to smile, which upset my mom more. My mom continued, Robert is all set and does not want anything, but he would like some respect from you. She said OK, would you like anything else? 

At this point, my mom is fuming and thought she'd better let her go so she can cool down. This waitress was ignorant and unkind. She still never acknowledged me or even apologized for her disrespectful treatment or thoughtlessness. We had no choice but to mention it to management. 

The manager was very apologetic and, after offering some excuses as to why "people" do this, which was not welcomed at all into the conversation, he said he would for sure use it as a teaching moment and retrain all his staff concerning this whole encounter. 

I am not going to give the name of the restaurant for many reasons, but the main reason is that it had nothing to do with the restaurant itself, and it had everything to do with awareness and to show how different people with disabilities are treated. This waitress was unable to address her faults or come to the realization of what she had done. It was, to say the least, infuriating to have someone like this waitress at our table. 

I can't even begin to tell you how many times I have been treated poorly by complete strangers just because of how I present.  And the stares, oh the stares, they are all day, every day.

I have been brought up well, and I am respectful and kind. I would never treat someone this way, and I think I have the right to do so at times when I am being treated so unkindly. But I would never do it. I am told I have a great smile, but it's not often that strangers take the time to see it. 

I welcome questions, and my mom loves it when kids ask them because we want them to feel comfortable doing so.  But when parents rush their kids away, it leaves them believing they should be afraid and not talk. Parents are often embarrassed by the questions kids ask, but they are innocent, honest, and we very much welcome them. We don't have to get into a long conversation. One thing I have noticed is that they just want to ask a question, and then they are good to go.  

I have a feeling this waitress was rushed away during her childhood, and this is what she "learned" to do when she encountered anyone different from her. Maybe she has no idea that people have disabilities, but she needs to get a clue, and if she is going to remain in the food industry, it needs to be quick. We are here and we are here forever, just like you. 

Let your kids ask questions instead of staring. Teach your kids that someone with a disability is no different from them.  They may do things differently or need extra "stuff" to help them, but we all have a beating heart and have feelings. We are no different.

Don't pretend that anyone with a disability does not exist, talk to us like you do anyone else. And don't talk down to us like we are your pet or a baby, and for God's sake, don't yell at us like we can't hear you. Believe me, we hear you and see you. 

Remember that our disabilities do not define us, but we are stronger because of them. 

We hope to go back to this restaurant and have a whole new experience. 

Let me know in the comments if you have encountered a similar scenario, how you handled it, and what the feedback was. 

Thanks for reading!

Robert